Can You Explain It To Me?

__________________________________________________
Published by Rachelle Disbennett-Lee
Wednesday, February 27, 2002
=============================================

People can say some very strange and hurtful things. Sometimes they mean it and sometimes they just speak without thinking. Their remarks still hurt in either case. Do not swallow your feelings when someone says something mean to you. Stand up for yourself. Ask them to clarify what they said. Try, "I am not sure what you meant by that. Explain it to me?"

By simply asking them for clarification and not accusing or being confrontational you allow the other person to rethink what they said and to explain their comment. It also gives you the opportunity to take a moment to think about how you will respond.

Coaching

Communications are sometimes difficult even painful. However, if you set clear boundaries, others they will soon learn what they can and cannot say (or do) to you. If you call people on what they say, they will be more careful when they are around you.

You have the right to let people know what they can and cannot say in your presence. This is called setting boundaries. Boundaries let others know how they can behave and what you will tolerate. When we have strong boundaries, people have more respect for us.

Do you need to strengthen your boundaries with someone?

Daily Success Formula

Boundaries = Clear expectations

Quotes

"Use what language you will, you can never say anything but what you are." Ralph Waldo Emerson