People Say The Darnedest Things

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Published by Rachelle Disbennett-Lee
Thursday, February 21, 2002
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People are so funny and what they say can be even funnier. People value their opinions so much that they feel the need to share them, no matter what. I also notice that when some people speak the brain shuts down and the mouth goes into full operation.

At a networking meeting I was attending, I ran into a woman from another group I belong to. She immediately commented on my hair and how wonderful it looked. I thanked her and told her that I was going to wear this particular wig all the time since I had just received two other compliments. She replied, "Oh you should because the other wig you wear makes you look short and fat." I couldn't help myself. I simply burst out laughing. I thought that was the funniest thing to say especially to someone she was just complimenting.

People believe what they say and for her that was true. She also felt that she needed, for whatever reason, to share that comment with me. Thankfully, I ignore such comments. I really couldn't care less what others think about how I look. Although compliments are nice, they don't make or break me and neither does criticism. Once I understood that compliments and criticisms are the same, simply someone's opinion, I am able to let the comments of others go. I also realized that her comment was more about her than it was about me. It isn't worth taking personally.

I always look for the lesson when things like this happen. In this, I found several. I need to make sure that I am always conscious of what I say to others and my intention in saying it. If I give myself just a few seconds to think about what I am going to say, I can stop myself before saying something that isn't supportive. I often ask myself, "Will what I am about to say help this person in any way?" If not, I don't say it. I also learned that some people are unconscious and what they say has little value.

Coaching

People say the darnedest things because they don't stop to think how their comments will affect the other person, or maybe they just don't care. Whatever the reason, only we can decide how the comments of other people will affect us. For the most part, it is not worth getting upset over careless words. Simply let it roll past you. Life is too short to worry about what other people say.

What is the darnedest thing you have heard lately?

Daily Success Formula

Unconscious + Words + Opinion = Saying the darnedest things

Quotes

"I have long since come to believe that people never mean half of what they say, and that it is best to disregard their talk and judge only their actions." Dorothy Day