What to do When You get Changed On

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Published by Rachelle Disbennett-Lee
Saturday, February 9, 2002
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I attended a meeting with the president of a company and another consultant to discuss an upcoming presentation to the board of directors. The consultant was going to present data he had collected and I was going to give a seminar using a communication assessment. We had made the arrangements several months in advance and this meeting was simply to go over last minute details.

Well into the discussion, the president passed out the agenda for the board meeting. Much to my surprise, my entire presentation was eliminated and in its place I was given a thirty-minute slot to do an icebreaker on change. I was also appointed to facilitate the entire six-hour meeting. To say I was shocked would be an understatement. When I asked what had happened, the consultant calmly said, "You've been changed on."

At this moment, I had several choices. I could have refused to go along with the change since that was not contracted. I could have gotten angry and stormed out. I could have said nothing and acted like the change was acceptable. I could have spoken my mind and worked something out with the client. I chose to let the client know that I was not happy with the change and surprised that I wasn't notified. I also let him know that change was not one of my speaking topics. After negotiating, the client and I came to a compromise. We agreed that the seminar I originally planned to provide would be rescheduled and I would present it at a latter date for an additional fee.

I was able to work through being "changed on" and arrived at an alternative that was both beneficial and satisfactory to the client and me. I flowed with the situation and established boundaries around what I would do. By being flexible with the change, I actually gained by creating another opportunity in which to present my original program.

Coaching

There are times when we will get "changed on." Change happens. That does not mean we have to lose control or choice. I had many choices to handle the situation and I chose to go with the flow and make it work for me. I was open and honest about my boundaries as to what I would and would not do. Because I was willing to be flexible and work with the client's needs, I ended up with additional work. The client has thanked me several times for being so flexible. What I realized during this change was that it was more important to maintain the relationship than it was to be right. I decided to make the change work for me.

We cannot control being "changed on." What we do have control over is how we respond to the change. Give yourself a moment to take a deep breath and decide how to make the change work for you. Fighting against the change most likely will not benefit you. Look for alternatives to make the change work for you. Change can be good if we allow ourselves to be in the flow and create great possibilities from of it.

Have you been changed on lately?

Daily Success Formula

Changed on = Opportunity for greater possibility

Quotes

"A decision made at night may be changed in the morning." Samoan Proverb

"A wise man changes his mind, a fool never will." Spanish Proverb

"Adapt or perish, now as ever, is nature's inexorable imperative." H. G. Wells