Make A Choice
If You Don't Like It, You Can Always Make Another Choice

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Published by Rachelle Disbennett-Lee
Tuesday, January 29, 2002
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Many times I see people get stuck because they believe that if they make a choice, they will have to live with it for the rest of their lives. Not true. We are only stuck if we choose to be. Often, we have to make a choice in order to know if it is the right one or not. If we are not happy with a choice that we make, we can always make another choice.

One of my clients was taking an early retirement after thirty years with the same company. He wasn't ready to stop working, but feared that he might get stuck in a job that he didn't like. He asked me, "Then what would I do?" I replied, "You will quit and find another job." This was a revelation to him because he spent much of his career not realizing that he had a choice. His belief was that once one had a job they stayed with it no matter what. Not in this day and time. According to Candice Carpenter author of Chapters: Create a Life of Exhilaration and Accomplishment in the Face of Change, "We can expect to hold eight to ten jobs in our adult lifetimes and to pursue three distinct careers."

A friend of mine had always wanted to live in the Midwest. An opportunity presented itself that provided the chance to move her family to Ohio. After six months there she realized it was a mistake. She did not like the Midwest as she thought she would and her family was miserable. She felt like a failure and was not sure what she should do. After thinking about it for a few more months, she decided to move back to Denver. I asked her what she had learned from her experience. She said she learned that you never know until you try. She ended up coming back and getting a better job than what she had left, moved into a neighborhood that she had wanted to live in, and had a new appreciation for her hometown." She was glad she took the chance and also glad she allowed herself the flexibility to change her mind.

Coaching

When we feel trapped, we can do all sorts of strange things. Feeling trapped makes us want to escape and we will often be reactive instead of proactive. Allowing ourselves the option to change our minds puts us into a power position. We will not simply be reactive, but can stand back from the situation and make decisions based on choices that we want instead of what we feel we have to do.

If we choose to stay in a situation that we are not happy with, know that it is a choice. At least knowing that we have choices allows us to move from feeling like a victim to knowing we have the power to change if we decide to. If we decide not to change the situation, we could decide to change our attitude towards the situation. Once we know we have the power to decide, we can shift how we feel about the situation. That may be all that is needed to give us a whole new perspective.

Where in your life are you feeling like you have no choice?

Daily Success Formula

Changing your mind = Choice

Quotes

"Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice." Wayne Dyer

"I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude." Judith M. Knowlton

"Look for your choices, pick the best one, then go with it." Pat Riley