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Published by Rachelle Disbennett-Lee
Wednesday, December 12, 2001
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Although there are people who have a strong
need to be right (and they are right even when they are
wrong), there are people who are wrong even when they are
right. These people make others right even when they are
not right or they downplay their ideas and concepts so as
to not to make someone else feel bad. It is all right to
have ideas and opinions and it is all right to be right.
Letting others know what we think and standing up for ourselves
are positive things to do. Even correcting people is OK
when they are in the wrong.
I personally have a challenge with telling
others that they are wrong even when they are. I don't like
to be embarrassed in social situations and I transfer that
to other people and assume that correcting others will be
embarrassing to them. Actually, not correcting people and
allowing them to be wrong can be even more embarrassing.
I once let someone refer to me by the wrong name for quiet
a while. Someone else corrected her and she was angry with
me for not letting her know sooner. People actually appreciate
being told they are wrong if we do it in a supportive way.
Lying so that others can be right doesn't
support them either. I had a situation where I had given
some documents to another person. She later came to me looking
for the documents. I informed her that I had given them
to her. She insisted that I had not in front of other people.
Although I knew I had given her the documents, I lied and
said I must have left them somewhere and would check later.
The following day she found those documents and never apologized
for accusing me of not giving the material to her. I felt
out of integrity for lying to her and she never got the
opportunity to take responsibility for her actions.
When we are right, it is important for us
to be right. We don't have to be rude about it. We simply
have to tell our truth and stand by what we believe. Being
right isn't a bad thing.
Coaching
When you know you are right stand up for
what you believe. Being right is OK. You don't have to be
rude about being right. You simply have to state what you
believe and leave it at that. And when someone is not right,
it is all right to correct them. Correcting them allows
them to adjust their behavior and make a choice about what
they want to do. If we never tell someone they are doing
something wrong, they never have the opportunity to change.
Are you OK with being right?
Daily Success Formula
Being right + Telling
your truth = Personal Integrity
Quotes
"A theory has only the alternative
of being right or wrong. A model has a third possibility
- it may be right but irrelevant." Manfred Eigen
"No one likes having offended another
person; hence everyone feels so much better if the other
person doesn't show he's been offended. Nobody likes being
confronted by a wounded spaniel." Ludwig Wittgenstein
"The best way to win an argument is to
begin by being right." Jill Ruckelshaus |
