Tell Me About It

Most people love to talk about themselves and what they are doing. The unfortunate part is that many of us never get asked to go into detail about what is going on in our lives. Even the question, “How are you?” isn’t really a request for information. It is simply a polite greeting we say when we see someone we know. Most of the time, we are dismayed and maybe annoyed when someone actually does tell us how she is. If we want to have deeper more meaningful relationships, we need to ask people questions about how they are and what they are doing, and then be prepared and willing to listen.

In a talk I attended given by Dottie Walters, she suggested saying, “Tell me about it.” This gives people the opening to share what is going on in a more in-depth way and demonstrates that we are interested. In addition, people will often be more willing to provide information that we need when we prompt them to do so. Just asking lower level questions often isn’t going to provide us with the information we require. There is a warning to this. When we prompt people to “Tell us about it” they will.


Don’t settle for conversations that say nothing. Practice requesting a deeper level of communication by asking people to tell you about it. Just discussing trivial things is a waste of time. Be willing to have deeper more meaningful conversations with people. You will be surprised and delighted by what you discover.

Coaching Question

Are you wasting your time on meaningless conversations?

Coaching Challenge

Practice this week saying “Tell me about it.” Write in your journal the response you receive and how it feels to have a deeper more meaningful conversation.

Daily Success Formula

Tell me about it = More meaningful conversations


“Only mediocrity can be trusted to be always at its best.” Max Beerbohm

“Don’t knock the weather, nine-tenths of the people couldn’t start a conversation if it didn’t change once in a while.” Kin Hubbard

“I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation.” George Bernard Shaw

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